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Nicole Sylvia Javorsky
About
Shop
Visual Art
Gallery
Artist Statement
Series Descriptions
Portrait Commissions
Original Paintings & Mixed Media Works
Original Drawings
Art Prints
Underneath My Silence (2023)
In the Raw (2023)
Artwork Archive Portfolio
Shop my art on SINGULART (Ships Globally)
Music
About My Music (Alice Celeste)
Singing Lessons
Listen on Spotify
Writing
About Chicken Doodle Soup
Into the Light Book
Authory Portfolio
More
Exhibitions, Performances & Media
FAQs
Contact
Login Account
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About
Shop
Folder: Visual Art
Back
Gallery
Artist Statement
Series Descriptions
Portrait Commissions
Original Paintings & Mixed Media Works
Original Drawings
Art Prints
Underneath My Silence (2023)
In the Raw (2023)
Artwork Archive Portfolio
Shop my art on SINGULART (Ships Globally)
Folder: Music
Back
About My Music (Alice Celeste)
Singing Lessons
Listen on Spotify
Folder: Writing
Back
About Chicken Doodle Soup
Into the Light Book
Authory Portfolio
Folder: More
Back
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Shop Underneath my silence
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Underneath my silence

$180.00

Digging into the details:

  • Original one-of-a-kind artwork

  • 6 inches wide | 6 inches tall

  • Mixed media on canvas

  • Arrives ready to hang, unframed

  • FREE shipping on all orders within the U.S.

  • Request a quote for international shipping

Add To Cart

Digging into the details:

  • Original one-of-a-kind artwork

  • 6 inches wide | 6 inches tall

  • Mixed media on canvas

  • Arrives ready to hang, unframed

  • FREE shipping on all orders within the U.S.

  • Request a quote for international shipping

Digging into the details:

  • Original one-of-a-kind artwork

  • 6 inches wide | 6 inches tall

  • Mixed media on canvas

  • Arrives ready to hang, unframed

  • FREE shipping on all orders within the U.S.

  • Request a quote for international shipping

As a child, I was taught that my humanity was a liability. That to show my pain on the outside was to open myself up to misunderstanding, gaslighting, feeling even more alone.

Before I was hospitalized for anorexia at 14 years old, I was not okay for years. As a child, I showed many of the signs of being sexually abused: persistent nightmares, bruising, regressive behaviors, changes in eating habits, fear of being alone at night.

I was expressing myself in ways that made sense for my age. And I tried to express myself with my art and writing too. No one heard me.

Silence is its own kind of speech. Nightmares are their own kind of communication. Same for changes in the otherwise ordinary: eating, showering, sleeping.

I didn't feel heard. I didn't feel seen. I kept trying to communicate what I was feeling, my needs, my confusion, my story, the fact that I was being sexually abused by my teacher. And my trying led to many more wounds.

This was the truth bound up in my silence. It's not that I didn't want support. It's not that I didn't want the abuse to stop. It's not that I didn't want to be heard, comforted, held, loved, supported. It's that trying to access support had been the prologue to some of my most painful memories.

Silence became at once protective and its own kind of pain. Its own kind of deprivation.

About the Layers collection

How much of what we perceive has to do with depth? The willingness to peel back layers and to look underneath? To scratch the surface, get a peek, and then keep digging deeper and deeper and deeper?

Healing feels like an ongoing process of peeling back layers and building new ones. To lift a mossy rock and dig through the dirt underneath. And to build a home where I can be free on newfound solid ground.

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Thank you!

Nicole Sylvia Javorsky

Staten Island, NY 10301

info@nicolejavorsky.com
718-541-2708

Nicole Sylvia Javorsky | Visual artist, musician, writer | About Shop Blog

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